The Side of Entrepreneurship That Isn’t Talked About Often, Part 1

“He who conquers others is strong; He who conquers himself is mighty”. - Lao Tzu

In this two-part series, I want to talk about anxiety. This is something that we entrepreneurs don’t talk about often. I am going to. This wasn’t easy to write. I stopped myself several times to write something else. It’s got to be done. It’s going to sound a little dark. I make no apologies for doing this. I have struggled with anxiety before. I know you do too to some degree. In this part one, I want to talk about what I know about you and anxiety.

This is what I know.

I know you love your business. I know you are the rock of your team. I know you are passionate about what you do. I know you are always there for your customers.

I also know you. I want you to be honest. I know there is a side of you they don’t know. There is a world you travel in. A world they would never know unless you tell them. In my case they would never know unless something goes terribly wrong. And something did. I will write that story some other time. Today is about you.

I am talking about the world of your anxious mind. I am talking about your imagination. All the dynamic, passionate and performance-driven entrepreneurs I work with have that side. It’s dark. It’s deep. It’s fun. It’s a virtual reality. It’s real. It feels strange. It appears out of nowhere sometimes, without a warning.

I know you are confident in what you do. I know you radiate passion. I know your friends think you have the world in the palm of your hands. I know you better. Remember, I am you.

You are afraid.

You are insecure.

You feel guilty.

You have shame.

You doubt yourself.

You are skeptical.

Your consciousness is playing games with you right now.

Your mind is telling stories.

These are the stories I hear.

Do I have what it takes?

What if I don’t get funding?

I don’t think they like me.

I am not sure this is going to work out.

Should I shut down this business and get a real job?

What if I don't make it?

When is this thing going to turn?

I am a loser.

I am a failure.

I am not sure I can do this.

Why did this happen to me?

You are worried.

Your mind is racing.

You are sacred.

Your thoughts sound too loud.

Why are you feeling this way and what do these thoughts mean?

You have anxiety. I hate to be the bearer of bad news. It’s not all bad if you stick with me. There is some good stuff coming. I promise.

The anxiety comes because you care and sometimes caring a little too much causes us to focus on the wrong things.

Instead of taking care of ourselves, we become people pleasers. Being a people pleaser is not a healthy thing to do. The truth is you can never please anyone no matter how hard you try. I love this quote from Viggo Mortensen “If you’re trying to please everyone, then you’re not going to make anything that is honestly yours, I don’t think, in the long run.”

I want you to live a healthy life. I want you to live your dream, the right way. I don’t want you to suffer. There is a better way to build your business and lead yourself and others – that’s being true to you.

I know you want to be happy. I know you want to be successful. I also know that if you want to truly overcome your anxiety, happiness and success should never be the goal. Happiness and success are outcomes of a life well lived. Here is how Viktor Frankl puts it.

“Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it. I want you to listen to what your conscience commands you to do and go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge. Then you will live to see that in the long run—in the long run, I say!—success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think of it.”

In the interest of full disclosure, I have to tell you that I am a follower of Jesus and I love the Bible. In the book of Philippians, Paul the Apostle addresses this topic of anxiety and puts it even more beautifully than I can “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”

I don’t know if you believe in God or not, but I do. Each time I get overwhelmed with anxiety, I get on my knees and pray. I pray with the same level of intensity as the anxiety if I have to. You can worry and be anxious if you choose to, but as Jesus says “And can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your span of life.”

There is a better way to live life less anxious. I call it living smart. I call it living wise. It’s about conquering yourself. Not anyone. It’s about going higher not getting high. It’s about understanding who you really are in this world.

In part two of this series, I will share with you what I believe about anxiety and what I want for you as an entrepreneur.

If you are struggling with entrepreneurial anxiety, and you want help overcoming your anxiety, finding out who you truly are as an entrepreneur, what you want, and how you’ll get there, book a free consultation call with me. I promise, you’ll feel better after our call. You’ll know how it feels to build your business differently and pursue the right goals. You’ll stop wasting your time on people who don’t value you or people you can’t make a difference to.